The Story of Alexander Evelyn Spider
?-August 14, 1994


We were talking about spiders in the dark, at night. That's never a good idea, because you get to imagining things. So we got so scared, we turned on the light only to find a big, hairy spider. You can't kill anything without properly naming it, so we gave it a name. We decided it was male, but somehow the poor thing ended up with the name of Alexander Evelyn Spider.

We killed the spider on August 13, 1994. Or so we thought. The next day, Mr. Spider moved all the way across the room. It looked dead, but just in case we smashed him really good this time. Then I got a shoebox for him to be buried. He stayed in the box a really long time, but somehow the box is now gone. Just like Alexander Evelyn.


Freebie Kingdom